Until then

We're all strangers here

The pain is temporary

So it's alright if you can't 

Stop the 

Someday 

We'll touch The face 

And the sorrow will disappear 

Refresh

Some nights some days I allow

These memories to flood my mind

Is it not better

To remember and feel pain

Or is it worse

I cannot afford to let it

Disappear

To let it wash away

Next to nothing I will have

These are treasure

So

Some nights some days I allow

Katherine-s

Ellise didn't appear at work today and was slightly feeling meh because she left me to rejoice about Friday all alone in my office cubicle!!! However it still turned out to be an amazing Friday. Best thing was that boss had to do a site visit, together with Will and AikBin. They left at 3.30pm AND THEN I SLACKED ALL THE WAY UNTIL 6PM HAHAHAHAHA. Well, I planned for life group games and finished An Abundance of Katherines and then drank my Old Town 3in1 coffee(bad choice, gave me a stomach ache) and ate a small slice of butter cake.

I've decided that having slack work for my last 3 weeks and being bored is better than having so much things to do, plus being stressed.

Anyway, the Katherine book. Okay, I'm on a roll here; John Green roll~ AOK pales in comparison to TFIOS but it's still an okay book. It's about this genius, Collin, who has a thing for anagrams and has dated 19 Katherines in the past 8(?) years of his life. Once in awhile, there's this witty stupid humour which was unexpected and would make me lol (if i did remember it correctly. pardon me but the last time i read the first half of the book was half a year ago). He also has a cool, funny & fat (no surprise) sidekick called Hassan. Basically they decide to go on a summer adventure where Collin had fairly few Eureka encounters(and other sorts of painful & wonderful encounters).

-inserts fav quote from book-

“I feel like, like, how you matter is defined by the things that matter to you. You matter as much as the things that matter to you do. And I got so backwards, trying to make myself matter to him. All this time, there were real things to care about; real, good people who care about me, and this place. It’s so easy to get stuck. You just get caught in being something, being special or cool or whatever, to the point where you don’t even know why you need it; you just think you do.” - An Abundance of Katherines

There you go!
I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, 

Focus

Our highest calling as Christians can be simplified to loving God and loving our neighbor. There are many facets to this, including serving, generosity, compassion and ultimately making disciples—but all of these are built on loving God and neighbor.

By http://www.relevantmagazine.com/life/relationships/there-more-life-marriage#iUaI2JItrOQJrKgO.99

Star crossed

"I can't talk about our love story, so I will talk about math. I am not a mathematician, but I know this: There are infinite numbers between 0 and 1. There's .1 and .12 and .112 and infinite collection of others. Of course, there is a Bigger infinite set of numbers between 0 and 2, or between 0 and a million. Some infinities are bigger than other infinities. A writer we used to like taught us that. There are days, many of them, when I resent the size of my unbounded set. I want more numbers than I'm likely to get, and God, I want more numbers for Augustus Waters than he got. But, Gus, my love, I cannot tell you how thankful I am for our little infinity. I wouldn't trade it for the world. You gave me a forever within the numbered days, and I'm grateful.” 

Finished reading Faults and maaaan it was slightly depressing to have to go through Augustus' death twice - once in the movie and the other while reading. But I have to say the book is somehow less sad than the movie.. 

I loved many of the quotes in this book.. How does a guy think of all these quotes and stuff and weave it into a super good story??!??! Just how. 

“I’m in love with you, and I know that love is just a shout into the void, and that oblivion is inevitable, and that we’re all doomed and that there will come a day when all our labor has been returned to dust, and I know the sun will swallow the only earth we’ll ever have, and I am in love with you.”
- doesn't make much sense but it sounds good! 

"Sometimes people don’t understand the promises they’re making when they make them,”
“Right, of course. But you keep the promise anyway. That’s what love is. Love is keeping the promise anyway."

Everybody, tfios! Yes, I'm a sucker who threw myself onto this bandwagon & I'm not getting down~~~

Extraordinary, ordinary life

Finished watching About Time as recommended by Carl who I suspect is a hopeless romantic.(such rarity for a dude) After sleeping it through and thinking for the past 12hours or so since I woke up from my slumber I've decided the winner between AT & TFIOS. The winner is..

*drum rolls*

TFIOS!

Only because it was more...filled with brilliance throughout the movie? About Time wins the Moral of the Story award but it wasn't 24/7 engaging unlike TFIOS. RACHEL MCADAMS IS STILL BEAUTIFUL AND GORGEOUS AND I STILL ADORE HER A LOT TOO THOUGH.

Currently reading TFIOS and I absolutely love the language used in the book (which I don't fully understand..but still). It's just so so so brilliant!! It's been so long since I've read a good book and even though I don't have the time to finish the book all at one go I'm super glad I'm back to reading again. My EL needs some reinforcement and re-training through reading!! Sometimes I can't even bring across my idea to my Australian-educated colleague because I can't find the right vocab to represent my thoughts. I think I'll go to the UK for my post-grad trip/work!! Need it.

"And in the end I think I've learned the final lesson from my travels in time; and I've even gone one step further than my father did: The truth is I now don't travel back at all, not even for the day, I just try to live every day as if I've deliberately come back to this one day, to enjoy it, as if it was the full final day of my extraordinary, ordinary life."

The fault

But if you loved me

Why'd you leave me

Weird relationship thoughts

It's been so long since I've posted anything!!

Anyway there's just something that's on my mind ever since idk TFIOS or something. I realised that... I might have a certain tiny bit fear of being in a relationship with a significant other. I mean it's probably just my random mind conjuring all sorts of things but... it's pretty scary right?!

OK hear me out.

FYI this is me:
-your not so typical girl who used to think 21 is just about the right mature age to get into a r/s and get married at like what, 24?
-your not so typical girl who don't just date but believes in knowing someone, starting out as friends then idk LT relationship kind of thing
-your not so typical girl who hopes that her first significant other will also turn out to be the last.

So given all the above assumptions about me (idk if the above still applies today), it would totally suck if for example you get together with someone and for some unknown reason YOU BREAK UP WITH THEM.
For e.g.
1) He doesn't love you anymore
2) You don't love him anymore(yes, i'm being insecure about my ability to love)
3) Both of you had a different calling (this is Christianese, ignore if you do not understand)
4) Either or both of you gets cancer and he dies first before you because he freaking lit up light a Christmas tree (sorry I had to)

And well, the list goes on.

CAN U IMAGINE being together with somebody (for super long, like 8years) and boom, you realise that your life is meant to be led differently from your S.O. annnnnd you break up. Oh that heart break I can't... Yes, you could probably survive and "recover" from something like that but a piece of your heart is just

You know what would really suck? If I was the loser that would be the person that said "Let's break up, because XXXXXX." I'm such a dedicated, loyal individual... I would.. never.... BUT if it ever happens (pls no) I would hate myself so much lol.

#randompostover