I am getting old

Growing up doesn't seem as appealing as it did 10 years ago. I've learned - the hard way - that growing up also means death catching up with you. 

Just found out that one of my uncle in Penang passed away this evening. Even though i'm not close to him but you know CNY is just going to be slightly different with one less uncle asking you "How old are you? Where are you studying?" commenting "Wow you're so tall." all in Chinese with a Malaysian accent. 

Gone are the days where I could "boast" that I've never been to a funeral before and have no idea how it goes like. 

Sometimes in certain situations there is a need for one to act differently. One may be in terms of giving: stepping out of your comfort zone, giving your time, acts, attention to others. Other times you have to take: you withhold what you truly intend to do, you hold back on your actions, your thoughts, your feelings.

Both for the best interests of the other party. 

I wished I knew clearly when to give and take. For now, it's a gamble.